Back to Blogging Again

I had to give up blogging at the beginning of 2011. Then for 3 years (2011-2013), I could not blog at all and even writing a simple blog post in a day became impossible. I simply could not do any work. I suffered from bad health and mental stress. I feel that now, I can come back to do some writing and blogging is the thing I have enjoyed a lot since I seriously started it in 2006.

I am happy that it is not a false start. I don’t want to be a professional blogger- at least not at this point of time. I don’t want to suffer the stress of going after money through blogging. I live in a country where Paypal has not yet come. So, asking for donation for my blog or selling an ebook is out of the question. To make a living out of blogging would require a lot of efforts here. So, it is really not the time.

However, I can blog to get some recognition- getting some links from some top blogs and websites. Yes, I am going to blog for fun.

Ups and Downs: Downs and Ups

I just hope that this is not a false start. I feel that my health has improved enough to start writing again. Well, to be honest, my health was good even 6 months ago but sadly and unfortunately, I fell into a serious problem in life while trying to help others. Also, I had to do two big projects and had to make two trips abroad in the past six months. As a result, I suffered a number of false starts and at times, I almost gave up hope of coming back to writing not because of bad health but because of too much stress.

Health has really improved significantly over the last six months. Stress has decreased a lot too. I feel much clear in my brain now when I sit to write. In fact, last month (December 2013), I could translate a novel from Bangla to English. I translated around 37,000 words in a month. Well, the quality of the translation work was not bad either. So, I achieved something and it gave me a lot happiness. That is why I feel that it is not a false start this time.

This doing something concrete has given me real hope. I have gained a much needed momentum and all I need now is to just continue working on it. So, I like to come back to blogging and then I hope to become a successful writer in future. I always wanted to write and I have struggled a lot in life because of this decision. Anyway, we have opened a new blog on Bangladesh and I hope to write there regularly from now. It is an easy topic for me as I live here. Actually, I should have started a blog about Bangladesh much earlier.

So, after suffering a lot of downs, I hope that it is my time to go up in life. Health is wealth indeed and suffering in life is not bad. My struggles and sufferings have made me wiser. This wisdom has made me very happy. I don’t get sad or depressed like past. I also don’t get emotional over small and silly things in life. I am an Aries and like an Aries, maturity has come much later. I hope that I can make the best use of my wisdom that has come after suffering many failures.  

Never Give Up: Try Before Quitting

From yesterday, I have noticed that I can write blog posts naturally. For 3-5 years, it was very difficult for me to concentrate on blogging or writing naturally because of very bad health, bad stress and tension. Even last, week, I could not realize that I would be able to get so much better within a week. For the last months, I tried to rest as much as possible. This has been perhaps the main reason for my improvement in health. When you are out of work for a long time then it becomes very tough to come back to real work.

I have learnt a very important lesson. Most of the time, I was frustrated and I saw hardly any hope for the future. However, I never gave up and kept on trying. I never quitted. This is the main reason that I am standing tall again in life. Of course, I still have to go a long way but I feel much better and normal now.

Life is full of ups and downs. At times, life is boring too. However, life can be beautiful if you try to keep on fighting. 

Health is Wealth: Life is larger than Sorrow and Depression

I have not posted any entry in this blog since October 7, 2012. 2013 has been more or less a very difficult year for me so far. However, my health has improved a lot. I suffered many obstacles and problems related to others. I had to fight a lot for some of my close people. In fact, now my main problem is not health anymore but some personal problems and obstacles. Even most of the problems are not mine. However, since some of my disciples are facing obstacles in life, I am trying my best to help them.

Well, I hope that things will become much better for all of us and I can get back to full time work within a short time. It is this hope that has kept me alive and kept me going for the last 5 years. At times, it has been very frustrating and I felt that there was no hope for the future. At the on hand, my health only became from bad to worse and then I could not deal with the everyday real life challenges.

Things are becoming better and now, my main challenge is to gradually get back to real life work. It is a challenge because I have lost the habit of writing or working every day. I know that it will not be easy to get back that habit. In the last 5 years, I tried a lot to get this habit of working everyday but I failed and that is why, I have lost any hope of getting it back. However, my health has improved a lot personal problems have decreased significantly too. So, there is now real possibility of getting back to work.

When I look back to the last 5 years now, I feel happy and satisfied. Yes, things have been very tough indeed but the experience I have gathered is valuable too. I realize very well that failure is not bad, suffering is not bad. If you learn your lessons then you can become stronger and happier. You will become more successful in life. I am grateful to God that I could continue fighting during very harsh conditions. I have learnt a very important lesson that heath is indeed wealth. I must never neglect my health. I also must remain hopeful in difficult times. Life has ups and downs.

I also have realized that it is important to look after my mind too. IN tough times, a movie can make change your mood. I watched some underdog movies in the last one year. This week, I watched the movie Glory Road. This movie has inspired a lot and has given me real hope. I have remained most of my life a real underdog and perhaps time has come for me to accomplice something.

The future looks to be bright for me from now on. May be, I will have unprecedented success in life within in the next few years.

Just Take a Year Off from Your Life

I am writing here almost after 6 months. I am happy to say that my health has improved a lot and I am very happy now. 9 months of the year have passed and the only thing I have done in the last 9 months is to take care of my health. Most of the time, I tried to do nothing and believe me it is the most difficult thing for me. All my life, I have been a hyperactive person and I love to work hard. However, in the last 9 months, I tried not to do anything unless I was forced to do it.

As a result, my health got the scope to heal and I am almost back to normal health. I am not suffering from insomnia anymore. My diet has changed a lot and I have become a much better husband for my wife. I hardly earned any money in the last 9 months but fortunately, I did not suffer from financial stress. An amazing transformation is taking place in my life in every aspect. I can handle stress much better and real improvement is taking place.

I have watched many movies in the last 9 months and listened to all the songs that I liked. I have read some books and watched some games. Followed my favorite football club Arsenal like a fanatic and read a lot about them. I tried to do the things that I like and it helped me to spend time and do nothing. Yes, doing nothing was a very big challenge for me but I have learnt an important lesson by watching so many movies. The biggest lesson that I have learnt is that if you keep on trying something, you get better at it.

May be, you don’t get success or win but you see life if really like a marathon not a 100 meter sprint. You really don’t need to win in every battle simply because you cannot. So, don’t get intense about that. I have realized that life is much bigger than I thought. I can see life from a different perspective now and this is the biggest blessing for me. I met my wife online 10 and half years ago and we have been online for most of the time. Even now, she is living in another country and I am here.

In January, it will be two years the last time I saw her and I surely miss her a lot. She also misses me a lot too. However, we chat via Yahoo Messenger and Google Talk every day. While most people that know me simply cannot understand how we can remain a real couple virtually, we both know that we are the happiest couple among all the people we know. Happiness does not come easily but comfort may come. I am happy that I have tried to select happiness and real love over comfort in life.

The sufferings of last 3 years have surely made me wiser and I consider myself to be lucky for this experience. Sufferings have turned sweet at last. There have been very tough 3 years of my life but after that, my happy days have started. Failure is the pillar of success and really, Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. So, my advice to you is that when you fail in life, just try to take some off and do the things that you really enjoy. If you are suffering from any disease then take a year off and take care of yourself.

My problem was not bad health alone. In fact, my health became so bad because of some serious non-health related problems. My condition worsened so much that I almost gave up hope of staying alive. What a dramatic turnaround for me in just one year? I am getting back almost everything in life- health, skill, speed and happiness. The only thing that I need to get back is my career or work. However, that really should and must wait for the time being. At least, I have to wait for another 3 months as I am not still 100% fit. 

Getting Back My Life at Long Last

I don’t know if any of my 89 followers of this blog noticed the fact that I did not update this blog for the last 3 months but I surely missed writing in this blog. The good thing is that I have lost almost 11 KG (24.2 lbs) and more than the weight loss, I feel normal for the first time in many years. I feel great. I still need to lose 6-7 Kilo Gram but I really feel normal in my heart, chest, stomach and head. The best thing that has happened is to me is that 90% of my stress is gone.

I have missed almost 3 years of life and I could have accomplished so much in blogging in the last 3 years. Just last week, I was present as a discussant at a seminar on “New Media, Blogging and Social Responsibility” held in a university. I was not the keynote speaker but I enjoyed speaking at the event. Nearly 2 months ago, I took part in a discussion program in a local TV channel. I went there as an IT (Information Technology) journalist and the live talk showed continued for 45 minutes. Next week, I am supposed to conduct a workshop on Online Journalism and Online Writing in another university.

I was very happy that I could last for 45 minutes in a live talk show because, I had no experience of live television before that. By the way, I am also involved now with a research project with a university. So, I am doing things but still not back to full time work. I have realized that I still need 3-4 months or even 6 months before I can think of starting a full time job. May be, I will have to wait until the beginning of 2013 for that but I am not sad for it.

I am not sad because, I have lost 3 years because I was always in a hurry. I did not wait enough and any time, my health showed some signs of improvement, I just pushed myself too much to get back to work. I am after all a workaholic person and I enjoy working more than anything else. I believe in working hard and I enjoy working more than most people I know. There is nothing wrong in it and it is even an appreciable quality. However, what is wrong in me is that I always tried this quality of mine to the most extreme level.

As long as I was young and healthy, it was not a bad thing and I overcame many limitations in my life because of this quality. However, now, I am not young anymore and I am still not back to my normal health. Even after I become healthy, I must be extremely cautious about not working too hard. Now, when I look back to the past 6 years, I really regret for working too hard. On the other hand, I have stopped regretting for the past because I know that my goal was good. I failed to achieve my dreams in life but I am making a fresh start.

My wife has taught me one valuable thing. According to her, health is the first basic thing of a human being. I now agree with her and I will never neglect my health again. I just forgot everything and got completely engrossed in a project if I liked it. I did not care about diet or eating healthy but just ate a lot when I liked a food. I also enjoyed finishing an interesting book within a night instead of sleeping. In short, I was a very emotional person and when I liked something, I just rushed towards it with all my ability.

As a result, I just lost my health and for the last 3 years, I could hardly work as I was sick and weak most of the time. It caused a lot of emotional pain for me because I was forced to stop working at my finest hours. Perhaps, it made me more desperate to try and it made my condition worse. If I just stopped trying for 4-6 months then surely, I would not have lost 3 years I guess. I surely needed to become wise and mature and I am happy for learning this lesson.

So, I must continue putting my health first and then my work. Otherwise, history will just repeat itself. I really from my heart would love to thank everyone for reading this blog for the last 2-3 years. Your reading this blog has surely helped me a lot to get some mental strength. I wish that I had been more active with this blog as I never dreamt of earning money from it. 

Happy New Year 2012 and Eat Well

I just noticed that I have not posted anything in this blog for the last one month. So, I wish a very late happy new year 2012 to all the readers of this blog. There are now 84 followers of this blog and I really wish to write some comments in some of these blogs but then, I am really trying my best to get my health back.

From 1 January 2012, I have seriously started an effort to change my eating habit. In the past, I have seriously tried to decrease my weight 4-5 times and each time failed. You see decreasing weight is not that difficult and each time, I could lose nearly 10 KG in just two months but then I got back the 10 Kilogram or 22 pound very quickly too.

What went wrong? Why I failed each time in the same way? Now, I know the answer. First of all, I tried to decrease weight very quickly and went for extreme calorie reduction. Water fasting became my favorite tool. I did not take exercise seriously. Because I hardly ate, doing exercise was impossible too. This time, I am doing two things different. First of all, I am not obsessed with decreasing weight rapidly. I am eating every day and not thinking of any kind of water fasting- at least not for the next 2 months.

I am taking one or two meals a day instead of 3. So, I have cut back on my calories but not that much. In the past, during my diet days, I almost or even totally stopped eating meat. This time, I have 100% stopped eating beef and mutton (goat meat) but I am eating chicken twice a week. As a result, I don’t feel weak like past. I normally eat a heavy lunch of nearly or some more than 1000 calories and 5 days a week, I eat vegetarian foods (with the exception of eggs). Then, at night, if I don’t feel hungry, I don’t eat the second meal. However, if I do fell hungry then I eat the second meal and the second meal is always raw food like banana or peanuts (without oil or salt).

On the two days that I eat meat, I take care not to eat more than 2000 calories. So, I am slowly but consistently losing weight without being that much hungry. The only sugar I eat these days is in my tea. I have almost stopped eating shrimp as I have high cholesterol problem.

I have stopped doing any work or looking for work at this moment. Any work brings stress and I really need no stress for the time being. This is a very wise decision because without it, I would not be able to totally focus on my health at last. If you are really trying to decrease your weight then try to take a break from your professional life for a few months.

Most probably, this time, I will become successful in decreasing weight to the desired level. I wish to decrease nearly 14 KG more in the next 15-20 weeks. However, I need to think of the time after I really reach to the desired level of weight. Until now, my weight came back very rapidly after reaching to the desired level. It happened on each occasion in the past. So, I need to find a good strategy this time. Well, you see when you consume more calories than you should, your weight will slowly increase and when you consume fewer calories than you should then your weight will slowly continue to decrease. This is really as simple as that.

So, I need to continue eating healthy food items as well do regular exercise to prevent the lost weight coming back. Of course, I cannot continue to be without any work for a long time but I am not that much worried for it because when my health improves then I can work hard and compensate for the lost days. After all, the hardest part is now not doing any work. I am fond of working more than most people.